Falafel Heaven!

With my pregnancy, I haven't been much of an eater.  Especially dinnertime.  I usually have a good-sized lunch and then I am pretty much done for the day.  Since about week 12ish, my sickness is GENERALLY confined to evening.  And it can be a doozy!  I am sure my not eating the last half of the day and my pukester tendencies ARE related but NO I am not planning on changing my ways any time soon.  Throwing up can change a person.

Anywho.  Andrew does most of the cooking.  By "most" I really mean "all."  And he will usually text me about twelve options throughout the day that I serially shoot down before either he gives up and suggests take out or I give up and tell him that whatever the thirteenth thing he suggested sounds "great but I'm a little tired tonight so I might just lay down after work" which is polite pregnancy code for "I'm not going to eat that."

Let me just say for the umpteenth time that my husband is THE BEST!  I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings by testifying claiming that HE IS THE BEST IN THE HISTORY OF THE ENTIRE WORLD so let's just leave it at: Andrew is the best most perfect husband FOR ME.  There.  No ruffled feathers?

Well, at week 14, day 3, I decided to do something crazy.  I was going to cook dinner.  And not just any dinner.  I set out on a path to make a copycat version of my favorite food on this planet: Chicken Pita Sandwiches from Oasis Falafel in Iowa City, Iowa.  (Disclaimer to Oasis Falafel: Please know that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery and that despite the fact that you are 1500 miles from my current location, I still manage to patronize your storefront yearly.)

Oasis Falafel is my heaven on earth.  I have been known to plan my vacations around this culinary wonderment.  I love you, I love you, I love you.

Exhibit A, ladies and gentlemen of the jury

Exhibit B

 I LOVE YOU.

 

Now the Chicken Pita Sandwich is no easy feat to duplicate.  And let me state plainly that your best option is to get on a plane and fly to Iowa to eat at Oasis Falafel.  However, I am 14 weeks pregnant with a strong craving, a husband in grad school, and no time to waste.  Get in my belly, now!

 

I used the online menu to gather the elements of the sandwich that I wanted to include and then searched www.allrecipes.com and Pinterest for ideas on how to recreate several items.  Some things I truly just made up as I went.  I didn't end up making baba ghanoush (I never even knew that it was on the sandwich) and I decided to only make the mango sauce and skip the tahini sauce.  I mean, let's not get too crazy here, right?  I have included the recipe below.  It looks a little nuts but it really wasn't too bad.  I just prepared half in advance and did the cooking about 40 minutes before we ate.

 

Andrew was in charge of the chicken.  He has really perfected grilling chicken!  It is always so juicy and the secret is to marinade it in a little oil.  Yum!  I sliced up some extra pita after I was done frying the falafel and just tossed it in the same oil.  Dusted the pita chips with thyme and sesame seed (doesn't need salt but still looking for sumac as Oasis suggests).  Yum!  Andrew and I had picked up some cucumber relish at the Farmer's Market that were a nice addition to the sandwiches as well. 

We had the most amazing dinner that night!  I snapped a quick two photos with my phone but--as you can see--my hand was shaking so much with excitement that they aren't the best quality in the world.  I just wanted to get on with the show and snarf that sandwich down!

 

And here is the Christmas miracle...

 

I ATE THE LEFTOVERS.

 

TWICE.

 

 





CHICKEN PITA SANDWICHES

This recipe has a lot of elements but is easily divided between two days.  Prepare the hummus, Mediterranean salad, falafel mixture, pickled red cabbage, and mango curry sauce the night before to really allow the flavors to incorporate well.  The results are a flavor sensation unlike any other.  Serve with pita chips and hummus and it’s almost like dining at Oasis Falafel in Iowa City, Iowa.

2 boneless, skinless chicken breasts                                         

Falafel (recipe follows)

6 pocket pita breads, warmed                                                  

Hummus (recipe follows)

Pickled Red Cabbage (recipe follows)                         

Mediterranean Salad (recipe follows)

Mango Curry Sauce (recipe follows)                                        

Feta cheese

Grill the chicken so that it has a really nice char on the outside.  While the chicken is grilling, take the falafel mixture and form 12 balls and then flatten into thick patties.  Heat 1 inch of oil in a large skillet over medium-high heat.  Fry patties in hot oil until brown on both sides.  Slice the chicken into large chunks.  Take a pita and divide in half and then open up.  Spread hummus on the inside of each half and add a falafel patty.  Fill with cabbage and Mediterranean salad.  Add chicken and top with mango sauce and feta cheese.

FALAFEL MIXTURE:

1-15 oz. can garbanzo beans, rinsed and drained                      

1 onion, chopped

½ c. fresh chopped parsley                                                      

1 t. minced garlic

1 egg                                                                                       

2 t. ground cumin

1 t. ground coriander                                                               

1 t. salt

Dash of pepper                                                            

Dash of cayenne pepper

1 t. lemon juice                                                            

1 t. baking soda

1 T. olive oil                                                                            

1 c. bread crumbs

Use a food processor to coarsely grind the garbanzo beans.  Set aside.  Use the food processor to blend onion, parsley, and garlic together.  Stir into the garbanzo beans.  In a small bowl, combine egg, cumin, coriander, salt, pepper, cayenne, lemon juice and baking soda.  Stir into bean mixture along with olive oil.  Slowly add bread crumbs until mixture is not sticky but will hold together; add more or less bread crumbs, as needed.  Cover and refrigerate.

HUMMUS:

1-15 oz. can garbanzo beans, rinsed and drained                      

3 T. tahini

2 T. lemon juice                                                                       

½ t. salt

½ t. minced garlic                                                                    

Olive oil

Water                                                                                      

Paprika

Blend garbanzo beans, tahini, lemon juice, salt and garlic together in food processor.  Slowly add 1-2 T. olive oil and then water 1 T. at a time until it reaches a smooth consistency.  Transfer to a serving dish and drizzle with olive oil and a dash of paprika.  Cover and refrigerate.

PICKLED RED CABBAGE:

1 c. vinegar                                                                              

1 c. sugar

2 t. salt                                                                                    

1 head red cabbage, shredded 

Combine vinegar, sugar and salt.  Pour over shredded cabbage.  Cover and refrigerate.

MEDITERRANEAN SALAD:

1 tomato, diced                                                                       

1 cucumber, peeled and diced

2 T. onion, diced                                                                     

3 T. vegetable oil

1 T. lemon juice

Mix together, cover and refrigerate.

MANGO CURRY SAUCE:

1 mango, peeled, seeded and chopped                         

2 T. sweet chili sauce

1 t. curry powder

Combine in blender and process until smooth.  Cover and refrigerate.

We Have Been Called!

Andrew and I really love our new ward in Virginia.  We are in the Lynchburg 1st ward in the Buena Vista, Stake.  Our bishop is Bishop Carlyle Shorter.

We had our "welcome interview" with Bishop Shorter when we first moved in and then he contacted our former ward to get the real scoop on us.  Bishop Adam Goodman has been called to replace Bishop John Keele in the Cherry Hill 6th ward.  Andrew worked with Bishop Goodman in Young Men's (Adam was the stake YM president) and in just a little over a year, Andrew had three Goodman boys with him in Teachers' Quorum.

I got the nicest Facebook message from Bishop Goodman:

"Your bishop called me yesterday to see if you two are as good as he thinks you are.   I told him you were even better than that.   Thanks for your service in the ward and your friendship.   Adam"

I can't tell you how much I cried when I read that message!  We loved our time in the Cherry Hill 6th ward and miss our first "ward family" so much!

Andrew and I finally got our callings the last week in July.  I say "finally" but I know that the ward has been working hard to find a good way to put us to work.  Andrew was called to be the second counselor in the Young Men's presidency and Deacons' Quorum advisor.  He is so excited to be working with the Young Men again!

I was called to be the Primary chorister.  This is a little bit outside of my comfort zone but I am excited to serve!

The same Sunday that we were given our callings, we were also asked to speak.  Since I like to write out my talks and deliver them verbatim, I can include mine below.  The Primary children sang a medley between my talk and Andrew's and I included the lyrics to the songs they would sing in my talk to help them review before they had to sing. 

Andrew is a much more talented speaker and he can "wing it" like a speaking professional.  I may ask him to jot down a few notes to include as well.

TO BE A PIONEER

July 28, 2013

Lynchburg 1^st Ward, Buena Vista Stake, Virginia

When I was a young girl in Primary back in Illinois, I admit that I paid little attention to lessons about the pioneers.  My parents were both converts to the Church and remain the only members among their immediate families.  Hence I have no direct pioneer heritage that I am aware of (and we have done a lot of searching through our family history!) 

One time we had a Primary president that held an activity for Pioneer Day—which is a day that we commemorate the pioneers reaching their final destination in the Salt Lake valley back on July 24, 1847.  We decorated our red wagons with patriotic streamers and balloons leftover from the ward’s Fourth of July parade and all of the girls wore bonnets and aprons.  The entire Primary rode around the Church parking lot several times for our parents, singing:

Pioneer children sang as they walked and walked and walked and walked.

Pioneer children sang as they walked and walked and walked and walked.

They washed at streams and worked and played.

Sundays they camped and read and prayed.

Week after week, they sang as they walked and walked and walked and walked and walked.

Later, as a Young Woman, we made a yearly trip to Nauvoo, Illinois for various reasons, as our stake center was only about four hours from Nauvoo.  Before the early members of the Church made their long journey across the plains and into the Rocky Mountains, they created a beautiful, bustling community along the banks of the Mississippi River filled with brick buildings that are still standing today.  I loved to go pick out fudge from the local Fudge Factory and we enjoyed the City of Joseph pageant.  There were restored shops to tour and every year I dutifully collected a Nauvoo brick, a prairie diamond, and a gingerbread cookie from the bakery.  I have quite the collection of Nauvoo trinkets!  We also toured the temple site and what remained of the old foundation and admired a small display of what the temple would have looked like back then.

In the April 1999 General Conference, when I was finishing my sophomore year at BYU, President Hinckley announced the rebuilding of the Nauvoo temple.  I believe that was what inspired my excitement for Church history.

My family took a series of weekend vacations over the following summers to various Church history sites to trace the steps of the early Saints.  The following excerpts are taken from my personal journals and photo albums:

We began in the upper Northeast where the gospel of Jesus Christ was restored in latter days through the prophet, Joseph Smith.

“In the New York area, we visited Joseph Smith’s boyhood farm, Peter Whitmer’s home and the Martin Harris home.  We also saw the Hill Cumorah and the new [at that time in June 2001] Palmyra temple.  The tours were really interesting and it truly humbled me to stand where such great men and women had.

“It’s hard to describe the feeling you have as you stand at the foot of Joseph Smith’s bed where the Angel Moroni revealed the location of the Golden Plates.  And how can you put into words the awe-inspiring surroundings of the sacred grove?  This vacation was a testimony to me of the sacrifice, courage and ultimate reality of the early [Church] members.  These tangible locations served to solidify my faith that God is real and [He] speaks to [His] people today…

“In] the Kirtland area, we saw the John Johnson farm, Kirtland temple, the printing office [for the Book of Mormon] and the Newel K. Whitney store.”

Just as the Saints made their way from New York and Ohio, we made our way to the sites in Missouri and Nebraska.  On this particular vacation we toured Independence including the temple lot as well as Adam-ondi-Ahman, Far West, Haun’s Mill and Winter Quarters.

“…Mom, Dad, Kyle and I decided to visit some [Church] history sites together.  Kyle was leaving for his mission [to] Chile in just a few weeks and this would be our last trip [with him] for 2 years.

“We had a great visit!  We toured the RLDS and Hedrekite sites, also.  We are definitely thankful to be members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and are indebted to the early pioneers for their tremendous lives!”

And as I had in many previous summers, I seemed to always find myself back in Nauvoo.

“I am lucky to live just three and a half hours [I was in my early twenties and a bit of a speed demon driving on the empty country roads] away from Nauvoo and Carthage—two [Church] history sites rich with Latter-day Saint heritage.  I still can’t believe that there is a temple where once there were ruins!  I never could have imagined that it would be rebuilt and in my lifetime, too.  Every time we drive around the bend in the road by the old Mississippi, the temple seems to just spring up in all of its majestic glory.

“Taking a day-trip to Nauvoo has become a summer tradition in our [Young Single Adult] ward.  We always make sure that our trip coincides with the City of Joseph pageant so that we can cram as much excitement into one day as possible—especially for those students who have heard about Nauvoo all of their lives but are experiencing it for their first time.”

These words that I recorded are not profound in any way.  But they are a part of my legacy of faith—something that I will leave for friends and future generations to know that I had a testimony of the restoration of the gospel of Jesus Christ, that I honor the sacrifices of the early members of the Church, and that I know that we have a Father in Heaven who lives and loves all of His sacred children. 

In our short married life, Andrew and I have been able to visit many of these same historical sites in Utah, Missouri, Nebraska, Iowa, Illinois and Ohio.  We have felt the influence of these Saints strengthen our own commitment to temple covenants and missionary work.  The Spirit we have experienced in these sacred sites has brought us closer to our Father in Heaven, our ancestors, and one another.  We are renewed to continually dedicate our lives to aid in “bring[ing] to pass the immortality and eternal life of man” (Moses 1:39) by following the example of our Savior, Jesus Christ.

As I became acquainted with the early Saints through their letters and stories and artifacts, I recognized in myself a pioneer spirit.  I, too, had that moment of conversion that led me to dedicate my life to living the gospel of Christ.  I faced challenges to my faith daily.  I knew that God had a plan for me.  I am a pioneer.

A few weeks ago, Andrew and I had the opportunity to substitute in Primary as the choristers.  I assumed that we had failed miserably.  I was right.  Apparently, Heavenly Father sees that I need a little more time in Primary and so next week I return after a twenty-two year sabbatical.  I hope I get it right this time.

One of the songs that Andrew and I learned with the Primary students was “To Be A Pioneer.”  I caught myself singing that song around the house and at work throughout the week that followed our brief stint in Primary. The words are:

You don’t have to push a handcart,

Leave your fam’ly dear,

Or walk a thousand miles or more

To be a pioneer!

You do need to have great courage,

Faith to conquer fear,

And work with might for a cause that’s right

To be a pioneer!

I am struck by the veracity of these simple words as we study the Doctrine and Covenants this year in Sunday School.  Every week, we ponder together as a class, whether or not we could face the challenges of the early Saints.  Could we show the same faith in God’s will for us?  Despite our own doubts, I want to tell you that the answer is yes.

In an October 1997 General Conference, Elder Dallin H. Oaks of the Quorum of the Twelve said:

“Many of our challenges are different from those faced by former pioneers but perhaps just as dangerous and surely as significant to our own salvation and the salvation of those who follow us.  For example, as for life-threatening obstacles, the wolves that prowled around pioneer settlements were no more dangerous to their children than the drug dealers or pornographers who threaten our children.  Similarly, the early pioneers’ physical hunger posed no greater threat to their well-being than the spiritual hunger experienced by many in our day.  The children of earlier pioneers were required to do incredibly hard physical work to survive their environment.  That was no greater challenge than many of our young people now face from the absence of hard work, which results in spiritually corrosive challenges to discipline, responsibility, and self-worth” (Following the Pioneers, Ensign, November 1997).

Perhaps our obstacles come in different forms, but the gospel principles that we employ to combat our challenges are the same used by the pioneers—principles identified by Elder Oaks such as commitment, courage, integrity, inclusion, cooperation, unity, unselfishness, sacrifice, obedience and faith.

And just as our pioneer forbearers—whether in the 1800s or those that we read about in days even more ancient that that—we, too, can turn to our Savior in times of challenge and strife and hear His words:

 “Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you.  Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid” (John 14:27).

“Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.  In all thy ways acknowledge him, and He will direct thy paths” (Proverbs 3:5-6).

Finally, a scripture that we will discuss in Sunday School this afternoon:

“…Peace be unto thy soul; thine adversity and thine afflictions shall be but a small moment; and then, if thou endure it well, God shall exalt thee on high; thou shalt triumph over all thy foes”

And just as Nephi, the Book of Mormon prophet responded, we can say:

“I will go and do what the Lord has commanded, for I know that the Lord giveth no commandments unto the children of men, save he shall prepare a way for them that they may accomplish the thing which he commandeth them” (1 Nephi 3:7).

Our beloved late prophet, President Gordon B. Hinckley said, “Whether you are among the posterity of the pioneers or whether you were baptized only yesterday, each is the beneficiary of their great undertaking” (True to the Faith, Ensign, May 1997, 65).

I testify that every one of us is a pioneer.  We all are on a spiritual journey that is unique to us.  No one has the travelled the path you have.  It is through faith in our Heavenly Father’s eternal plan and through the saving grace of the greatest sacrifice of all—the atonement of Jesus Christ—that we will persevere.

A Few Remaining Tidbits from the First Trimester...

I hate leftovers.

I have been wanting Sprite (weird for me).

I sleep a lot.

 

I am not accomplishing much.  But we are so, so, so happy to be pregnant! J

No need to get excited.  This is a belly shot but there isn't really any baby--just belly at this point.

 

& we are in good company!

My brother, Cole, and his wife, Emily, due January 11

The announcement from my brother, Kyle, and his wife, Ashley, due February 19

Breaking The News to our Friends!

August 2, 2013

Here is the announcement that we posted on Facebook and Instagram once we were ready to “go public” with our news:

Here is a closer look at our photo booth pictures:

You can follow our pregnancy adventures on this blog under the label "Mitchell 2" and on Instagram by looking for the tag: #jessgotjacked.

Thirteen weeks and one day!

Breaking The News to Family!

July 28, 2013

Andrew and I had a day to ourselves to enjoy the news of being pregnant before we shared the news.  On Sunday evening, we called my parents who were driving home from a visit to Kyle’s family in Florida to break the news.  Then we sent my brothers and sisters the following video:

"Jacked up” is a controversial phrase in our family.  My siblings and I use it when something is “messed up" as in reprehensible or objectionable.  We say it rather frequently.  My mom hates the phrase!  She maintains that it means “to get a girl pregnant” and has tried to curb us from using it.  We consulted Urban Dictionary with mixed results.  Hence, our video announcement.

We talked to my brothers and sisters after they all saw the video on a Google+ Hangout.  Everyone said they “knew” it.  Welcome to my family.

Then we Skyped with Andrew’s parents.  Andrew’s mom was in the middle of giving me some ideas for my Church calling when Andrew held up one of the photos from the ultrasound.  She was overjoyed!  Andrew’s dad came home a little after that and we did the same thing.  It was fun seeing their reactions.  We Skyped with Devin’s family as well and Clara predicted that it was going to be a “boy.”  Andrew had to text Kelani and Rachel later that night since they were running around that night and we couldn’t seem to get them on the phone.

The Emotional Roller Coaster of July 2013

Sick and tired.  Sick and tired.  Sick and tired.

Up and down on the emotional roller coaster.

Andrew and I were in limbo waiting for our pregnancy to come to its conclusion. 

We prayed constantly that we would be understanding of God’s will for our family and that all would go as He would have it.  We even prayed that if there was a chance we could keep this baby with us, that we could still have a healthy and strong baby.  That was something that Andrew started tacking on at the end after a few weeks. 

As hard as it was and as emotional as I could be, I can still say that I felt some overarching peace throughout.  It didn’t necessarily make it easier but this time I truly knew that it would be okay in the end.  It was like going through that metaphorical tunnel.  I could see the light.  I knew that I would get there. But it was still a tunnel that was difficult to maneuver (think the old “tire tunnel” at Thomas Paine elementary school).

I decided that I wanted things to just happen as they were supposed to.  We had been through a miscarriage before and I felt like I had a pretty good handle on how it would go.  I didn’t want to incur the expense of a doctor and I didn’t think there was anything they could tell us that would change our course.

I continued to be really sick.  I began throwing up more than I had before.  It was hard.  One night I just cried and cried.  I told Andrew, “This is too hard for any one person to bear.  It is too much!”  That broke his heart.  He wanted so much to take away the physical and emotional burdens that I was weighed down by, but he couldn’t.  He could only be with me as my body went through it all.

After almost three weeks, I decided that maybe it was time to get an ultrasound and see where we were.  I was hoping the baby would pass on its own, but I also know that I seem to have stubborn babies that don’t take kindly to eviction notices.  I’m proud to know that my babies are such fighters.

I called around to a few places and got some recommendations.  We decided to schedule with a community pregnancy center that offered free testing and ultrasounds through donations of time and money by medical personnel.  They were booked for about a week and could only guarantee a pregnancy test on the first visit.  That was really disappointing.  We really needed an ultrasound to see if we were still pregnant.

I had my test on July 18^th and—no surprise—was still measuring a high enough hormone count to be pregnant.  That happened last time with my urine test and so I wasn’t convinced.  I sat in the lobby for another hour and a half before they called me back to tell me that they were too busy to fit me in for an ultrasound that day and that I would have to come back in another week.  I begged to be allowed to stay in case they had an opening that became available at the last minute but they were pretty firm.  I was devastated.  Another week to find out.

I talked to Andrew and we decided to just transfer our care to the one practice in town with medical doctors so that we could start to figure out what was going wrong.  By the way,

Lynchburg really doesn’t have the baby thing figured out AT ALL.  They have two hospitals: one in town that has everything except maternity and psychiatry.  For those two specialties you have to go out of town to a Baptist hospital that only has maternity and psychiatry wards.  Also, they have one OBGYN practice with several doctors and one midwife practice in addition to the community pregnancy center that can help you for the first twelve weeks of pregnancy.  A little bit lacking if you ask me.  (I want Dr. McArthur and Orem Community Hospital!)

We made our first appointment at Women’s Health Services for Friday, July 26^th.  Andrew has Friday afternoons free.  He texted me on his way home from class to see if I wanted him to pick up lunch.  Cheeseburgers and fries from McDonald’s have been my one “yes” always food for the last three months.  I don’t know what it is.  Gross, I know.  But it hits the spot.  He accidentally sent the text to my entire family on an older mass text thread.  My family immediately became suspicious of his innocent question, “How does a cheeseburger happy meal sound?”  However, we had nothing to confirm to them.

If I may add—why was my family suspicious of me wanting McDonald’s?!  I’m an Isenbarger for crying out loud.  We love McDonald’s.  We never outgrew that extra special treat from our childhood.

We checked in at Women’s Health Center and they asked a few questions, took our payment, and sent us to the waiting room.  We were called back very quickly and taken to an ultrasound room where I was prepped for an ultrasound.  Hold on!  No paperwork?  No questions?  No doctor?  No easing me into it?  Did you want to buy me a drink first?  Are you even sure I am who I say I am?  Right to the point.  Which I guess is a good thing because we were there to find out if we were still pregnant.  I thought they may want a history, to know when the first day of my last period was, etc. but nope.  Hop on up there!

I WAS SHAKING!  Andrew squeezed my hand but I could tell he was nervous as well.  Right away our little jumping bean popped up on the screen.  And was that baby a mover and a shaker!  We both started crying.  I still needed to be convinced.  I could see our baby’s heart beating so fast but I had to ask, “Is it alive?  Is that the heart?”  I needed that reassurance.

“There’s your joy!” the ultrasound tech responded.  More tears.  We couldn’t believe it.  WE WERE HAVING A BABY!

We had lots of measurements taken and different views photographed.  It was amazing!  We loved every minute of it.  I couldn’t stop crying and shaking throughout.  What a miracle. 

Our baby is measuring ahead of its gestational age which coincides with what I was thinking.  Our gestational due date was originally February 8 but baby measured to a due date of February 5.  Thanks to my meticulous calendar-keeping, I am going to say February 6 pretty confidently.  Twelve weeks and a day at our ultrasound.  We were overjoyed.

We met briefly with a nurse practitioner who advised us to begin our prenatal care appointments and then I had some lab work to figure out my blood type.  Needles.  Blech.  This is going to be a crazy ride since I freak out about needles and IVs.  She wasn't able to explain the symptoms that I had back at the end of June and maybe that will remain an unanswered question for us.

Andrew and I went and got ice cream to celebrate.  We were basking in the news.  We were pregnant!

We know that this baby is another choice spirit from our Heavenly Father—already showing courage and defiance in the face of adversity.  We are in awe by such a heroic child!  It is humbling as parents, to have such an incredibly awesome person joining our family.

Beautiful profile

Our tech said, "Here is the face.  Is that too creepy for you?"



Baby head and baby bum



The baby had its hand up by its face and the tech wrote, "Hi!!!!" on the ultrasound

June 26, 2013--Our Biggest Curve Ball Yet

On Wednesday, I volunteered to work the afternoon for one of my new co-workers after she got sick.  I had a little lunch, threw it all up, wiped away some tears and went into work.  Needless to say, it was a rough start to the day.

I had a few patients, and during one particular patient exam, I began having—let’s say—very decided “foreboding symptoms.”  I was devastated.  I had previously calculated that I was approximately 7 weeks and 4 days—the same amount of time our last pregnancy lasted (although we had to wait another four weeks to miscarry.)

I really don’t know how I made it through the end of the day but I was definitely a wreck emotionally and physically.  I got out of the office as soon as I could that day and went home to tell Andrew.  He was crushed as well.  It was all over.  Again.

Judging by our last miscarriage, we assumed that we would have about three or four weeks before things would officially be over.  We hoped that it would be shorter due to that fact that what I was physically experiencing seemed much more definitive than even last time.  But we knew we had a wait ahead of us.

I can’t tell you the depths of our grief.  In some ways, we had had a hard time “accepting” this pregnancy in the first place since things never seemed quite right from the get-go.  It was just the day before when I looked and Andrew and said, “I really hope this pregnancy works out.  I am starting to get used to the idea that we’re gonna make it this time.”  What was wrong?  We seemed to have no problem conceiving.  But staying pregnant seemed to be the trick.

More June 2013 (& I'm In Lurve With Andrew)

I left the pregnancy test on the bathroom counter that day.  Occasionally I would go in and look at the screen.  I really think that I thought it would change and read “not pregnant.”  But there it was.  “Pregnant.”  On the third time I went into the bathroom, the cheap battery had finally given out and the screen was blank.  I threw it away.

I was a roller coaster of emotions.  This pregnancy just wasn’t going to work out.  I knew it.  No symptoms.  None.  But I had been cramping rather heavily which had led me to believe just days earlier that I was going to be starting my period.

At this same time, I was offered a dental hygiene position at Forest Dental Center.  I was able to negotiate three days a week while we were still getting settled in Lynchburg.  That was a real plus.

Our family of THREE at Andrew's White Coat Ceremony

In the meantime, Andrew began school at Lynchburg College in the Doctor of Physical Therapy program.  There was a white coat ceremony for his classmates at a beautiful chapel on campus.  He looked so studly in his new white coat!  We took a picture together (of the three of us) and in my heart sprang the beginnings of hope for our new little family.  I thought about what our lives could be like in the next three years of his program.

Andrew is doing so well in school.  He loves his professors, his classmates, the curriculum and he is so excited to be doing something that he loves.  He has become such a nerd!  The guy will study until midnight and be up by six the next morning to study more.  He spends the day in classes and the anatomy lab.  He is busy!  He excels at his exams and his hard work is truly paying off.

It has been an adjustment for our relationship.  He is very busy with school and I am very busy not doing anything.  About mid-month, I developed “morning” (what I meant to write was “all day and night”) sickness.  In a fabulous way.  I am glad that I remain an overachiever in all aspects of my Type A life.  I hopped aboard the Pukester Express and haven’t looked back.  So in addition to Andrew’s crush of school work, let’s throw in laundry, grocery shopping, cooking, errands, cleaning the house, etc.  I manage to drag myself out of bed to work three times a week only to come home just as quickly and get back into bed.

My husband is a hero.  He is the most selfless, loving, devoted man.  I am so lucky to have him in my life.  I am so grateful that when I feel like I have nothing to give; he continues to lift me up.  When my tears of ineptitude start flowing, he smiles and thanks me for working hard to have a baby.  He has carried me these last several months.  I don’t know what I would do without him in my life.  He is my everything.  I love him more and more and more every day.

More photos from Andrew's White Coat Ceremony at Lynchburg College